Friday, August 12, 2011

Right Now

I wonder right now what Carson and Leia's birthmother are doing.  Is Xio Chi, Leia's birthmother, on the other side of this world sleeping peacefully, or is she crying, or is she working, on the street starving, homeless?  Is Mong, Carson's birthmother, at peace or is she living the nightmare that she was while she was pregnant with Carson? 
I think of these women daily.  I really thought time would heal my longing of wonder.  But, it has not, and I am afraid that it will not.  I usually don't talk about it, but then someone will say something and it brings a reason to say something about these women.  And, today is no different.  A Mama waiting for a referral with His Hands asked today, "How did you receive your referral?"
And this was my response,

We received a phone call on Christmas Day asking us if we could Skype. Leia's birthmother asked to choose her adoptive family and requested that she be able to tell us herself. It was one of the most emotional days of my life. She told u...s that she wanted her baby girl to be with us. She wanted us to be her family forever. She said that she knew we would love her. This woman on the other side of the world, choosing to give us her child. It was just as emotional as when Carson's birthmother said "I choose you, he is better with you" (in broken English), and then handed me her child with tears running down her face.
 Girls and Guys.....you also receive tears of unfathomable emotion when you receive that referral. You dream of what that child looks like and then in an instant you know. You know what God has chosen. A MIRACLE!!!
I wish I could tell them everything from when they said their first word, started crawling, walking, using a fork, singing in church, saying their first prayer....
and maybe one day I can sit and tell them these things.  I love these women and am so thankful they chose US. 
Xio Chi and Mong, I pray that you are comforted and know that your children are loved and that you have peace in your hearts.  Your love will always be made known to these precious babies.

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